8/8/08

Today, I am grateful for an important decision regarding the next academic year that was made this morning. A weight has been lifted and all anxiety is gone.

8/6/2008
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I am grateful for getting a little dressed up, having my sister-in-law be a baby sitter, a nice dinner, and a good show out among friends and my wife.

Today, I am grateful for a few minutes of play with my son that just took place a few minutes before we began to calm him down for bed.

Today, I am grateful for the reemergence of multiple professional opportunities that I frankly had forgotten about. I also remain grateful that the Gathering looms in the near future. A fine day of hurting and getting hurt a little bit seems like a good way to spend this Sunday!

I publicly bow my head in respect to "Dog" Randall. He's a good fighter, and more importantly a good person with a lot of wisdom. Be safe, Randall.

califkali,

Today, I am grateful that you do not have a tragedy to report. Best wishes to her and yourself.

Today is Saturday. I am grateful for the promise that Monday holds for some positive news of a professional nature. 

Mr. Torre,

Congrats to your son and to you as his proud pa pa! 

Today, I am thankful for a good time teaching and training in the morning, followed by a nice meal with my wife, son, mother, and grandmother in the evening time.

Today, I am grateful that the sore throat that I developed yesterday seems to be going away quickly.  The Gathering is right around the corner, and I can't lose training time!

7/30/08

Today, I am grateful for a number of new professional opportunities that have opened up in the last few days.

7/29/08

As a resident of Chino Hills, California, with the majority of my family living in Diamond Bar, today I am grateful that the earthquake that took place did not harm any of my family members and that there seems to me mostly superficial damage to our possessions and our property. I am also grateful that today's (relatively small) earthquake will hopefully remind California residents that earthquake preparation is very important.

7/28/08

Today/tonight, I am grateful to have led the first meeting of my training group since I fractured my foot in May. I am supposed to be ALL cleared on Wednesday, but I led a two-hour class tonight. It was great fun. I am grateful for the folks who made it to my home, and to have been left with a very positive feeling afterward.

Today, my family and I drove back home to southern California from a trip to Arizona. We came home to find that the house was in the same condition that we left it. We are now unpacking and doing laundry. No one broke in. Nothing flooded. A tree did not fall on our roof. I am grateful to be home, and for us to have been away for most of the week, with nothing going wrong here at home.

Today, I am grateful that the news during breakfast was filled with less acts of violence than yesterday's news.

Today, my wife's car battery died while we were far from home. She has a hybrid, and when we called the Automobile Club, they told us over the phone that there was no way to jump the battery. When the tow truck finally arrived, the driver had looked up a way to jump the car on the Web. I am grateful for the kind man's help, and to be able to drive away from the experience!

Today, I am grateful for all of the amazing sights nature has to offer.

Today, after traveling in a car for most of the day at high altitudes, my 15 month old son became sick and threw up in the back of the car. Neither my wife or myself expressed any anger or disappointment. Rather, I asked her if she wanted to carry in the baby or clean up the car. She opted for taking the baby inside. We set about our task of cleaning my boy, checking to make sure he was okay, and cleaning dirty clothes and automobile upholstery. While I was washing some very soiled clothes in a sink to get them ready for a journey to the washing machine, it occurred to me how grateful I am to be a father to a wonderful little boy and a husband to a great woman. If that means I have to clean up a little yuck once in a while, it's very worth it. 

I'm pleased that you think the thread is worthwhile, Guro.

Today I am grateful for my memories. I am transferring files from a very old computer onto a portable hard drive. When The transfer is done, I will wipe the hard drive with some software, and give the computer away. I have had the computer for about 10 years and it is filled with audio and video that is irreplaceable. I have a lot of good memories invested in that computer. It will be a little hard to see it go.

I am grateful for a new indoor fencing system, in which my 15 month old son can practice his walking.

Today, I am grateful that a major home organization project is starting to find an ending.

Today, I am grateful for my wife. She stayed home with the baby last night so that I could go out and see a midnight showing of The Dark Night, with some friends. I really enjoyed the film, but I don't see a lot of midnight showings in my future. I was wrecked for a good part of the day.

Today, I am grateful for some time in which I can get my home more organized. I am also grateful that my family has been helping in the home organization project.

Today, I am grateful for my grandfather. He passed away in 99. Yesterday would have been his 84th birthday. I am grateful for my grandmother as well.

My grandmother is still with us, but she would never attend a Gathering. About a year ago, she had her opinions about the martial arts rocked by an article in the LA Times about MMA. She is a very supporting, loving women, but she will never "get" what it means to me to be "Guide Dog". My grandfather would have been up front, cheering for the tribe, very much in a state of understanding of why we were all there. He was also a cantor at a synagogue in Orange County, so he would have doubly appreciated that we would all be gathered together because of the life's work of a nice, Jewish boy: Guro Crafty. 

Today, I am grateful to be living in this age of technology. Last night, I took several idle hours to download some really obscure music. Today, I put the music on my I-pod and was blasting it as I drove to have lunch with some of my family.

Computers allow us to have this forum and interact with and learn from people all over the world. It also seems to me that we are starting to use some of this new technology to make the world a better place. The world is far from perfect, but this is an exciting time in which to be alive!

My son is just about 15 months old. I can hardly imagine all of the things he will see in his lifetime!

Today, I am grateful for new beginnings.

Today, I am grateful for my in-laws.  They really are a second family to me.

Yesterday: I could not get to a computer so, yesterday I was grateful for the amazing men and women who have served and who serve our country in the armed forces.  I was also grateful for all of those folks in law enforcement.

Today, I am grateful for my 20's, the whole decade, good and bad, as it comes to an end in about an hour and a half.

Today, I am grateful that it is the last (full) day of a week-long research seminar for some graduate work I am doing.  I have about two and a half pages to go on a paper, and I will be happy to turn it in and move on!  Tomorrow we debrief for a few hours in the morning, and then I am off for 4th of July fun with the family.

Today, I am grateful for the challenges in my life.

Today, I am grateful for the experiences of my life that have allowed me to be who I am.  I had an experience today that made me sit back and say to myself, "You know, I'm a fairly interesting person."  I mean that with no arrogance.  It's nice to like who you are, and I am grateful for the experiences, good and bad, that have made me who I am.

Today, I am grateful for all of the opportunities in my life, particularly my education.  If I have expressed any disappointment about money recently, I take it back.  I am very lucky in many ways, and I need to appreciate all that I have.

Today, I am grateful for the pace of yesterday and today.  I was able to attend a great training session yesterday, a baseball game in the evening for my sister-in-law's birthday, and today I had a very productive day in grad. school.

Today, I am grateful for a unique training opportunity!

Today, I am grateful for the chance to spend the summer with my son, who is about to turn 14 months old on Tuesday.

Thank you Karsk, maija, and Guro Crafty for your followup posts.

I had the opportunity to discuss the same issues with a close friend recently and we had a nice, lengthy conversation about character, people, and values.  Karsk, there have been some REALLY good moments in the past five years.  I really love helping people acquire knowledge.  I started as a high school teacher and moved to junior high when I finished my masters because a position opened up that was in the area of my graduate work.  I had a former student from the high school visit my school site recently.  I knew him as a freshman, and there he was a senior, ready to graduate.  He told me that he had really enjoyed my class and that he was happy that I had stayed in the district.  That was nice.

It's just been a hell of a year.  My school site has new leadership.  We had a student that was stabbed (he lived, the knife missed his heart by a quarter of an inch).  Many key members of the staff quit, retired, or are changing schools and districts because the climate of our site has been so poor.  I am working on a doctorate in educational leadership as a teacher in an environment where the leadership seems to be moving the school in a bad direction.  It's very discouraging.  Many of the members of my staff (myself included) have commented that their stomachs are in knots everyday driving to work.  Being a teacher really fits into the needs of my life (family, training, graduate school), but I would like to do it somewhere else.  I have been on interviews, but I have not been able to find another home outside of my current position.  I am still working on it, and there is a lot of summer left!

So, I know that this is a thread about fatherhood.  Maija, that's very good advice: as my boy grows, he will be doing a lot of traveling.  I am always amazed at how friendly folks from around the world seem.  Again, I have meet many of them through DBMA and martial arts training, but even in my own non-martial arts related travels, it's good to get what my wife calls "new air" on a regular basis.

Also, not to whine, this has been a year when I have ended what I have considered to be my closest friendship for 15 years.  I am about to turn 30 in a few weeks so that is a very significant amount of time for me.  This was someone that I met on my first day of high school.  To make a long story short, that friend's girlfriend got into it with my wife when my wife was pregnant.  This resulted in a feud that went on for over a year and a half.  As a matter of fact, the last contact that my former friend had with me was an accusatory text message that he sent on the morning of the second day of the three day Gathering in April.  What I have come to realize is that I have paid my debt as far as the friendship goes.  I am sad it happened.  I know that I am partially at fault for what happened.  What I have also come to realize is that this person and his now fiance are living very different lives than my wife and I.  The main realization that I have come to is that I have a responsibility to my son and my wife to free myself from any guilt or sadness associated with the end of this friendship.  This person and I simply do not have matching definitions of "obligation" or "work ethic".  Neither of us has to be the bad person.  We are simply on different paths.  I realize that "people drift in and out of your life", and that I have been told this since I was very young.  However, like all younger people, I believed that I would be the exception.     I have decided that this person and his significant other are not good people to have in contact with my child.  It doesn't have to be a bitter thing, (like we ALL were making it) it just has to be called what it is (over)and it has been.

So, a bad teaching year, the end of s significant friendship, and working on a degree in leadership in an environment devoid of authentic, character-based leadership made me a bit sad, and pessimistic for a few weeks there.  Also, I fractured my foot a few weeks ago (at work of all things, a cherry on the cake of the 07-08 academic year) and working out has been hard.  I have been doing a lot of teaching and not much training.  Tonight, I just got out to my garage for the first time in a few weeks for some circuit training, kettlebells, and a nice walk.  The orthopedic doctor told me to get off of my crutches.  However, it is going to take a few weeks to rebuild my body.  My psyche also needs some rebuilding this summer.  So my previous posts on this thread are me being a bit melancholy.  I appreciate all of the folks out there offering kind words and positive energy! 

My son is working on walking and talking and I am so happy to be home with him this summer.  I need to focus on that, and trust in the feeling I get in my heart, my head, and my soul every time I look at him.

Today, I am honestly grateful for some time to work on some graduate papers.  Today, Guro Crafty was supposed to have a seminar at Surf Dog's, but it is going to be rescheduled.  So, I am grateful for not having missed out on that, while having the chance to plow through some work at home.   

Karsk,

I was thinking of pulling my posts from this thread.  I was worried they might sound too whiny.  I have a lot to be thankful for, and sometimes I lose sight of that. 

You have written on these boards before about knights and knighthood and your insight always seems to fit in to the topic at hand, as you have done again here.  I suppose I am struggling with how much hope to maintain that sometimes people can be good and the world can be a good place. 

I too had my father tell me in my youth that most people in the world as a$$holes and that I need to be careful.  I like people and I don't really want to live my life expecting people to be at their worst.  I again wrestle with what to tell my 14 month old son when he grows older.  How much reality do you arm your children with?  How soon?  Do I keep the chain going and tell my boy that most people are not to be trusted?  I realize that these are questions that are very old, but I intend to keep asking them, for myself and for my boy, and for all the folks out there who believe in character and authenticity.

Thank you for your insight, and for the passage, which I did NOT find too heavy.  It was just right actually.   

As I typed another post, my wife walked in with my 14 month old son in a laundry basket and said, "Hi daddy, here's your laundry."  My boy was grinning from ear to ear.  I appreciate the little moments.

Woof Crafty and Tom,


That's fair.  Within that, I see people hurting one another, back and forth.  Good folks looking for love, and some just looking for the lovin'  .  Crafty, you are correct.  Many of the things I am bit&^ing about because I am sticking my snout in where it doesn't belong.  I am happily married.  I just wish some of the folks out there would stop hurting one another, or find what they are looking for.  I guess I just wish people happiness.  I realize how naive that must sound.

Again, I suppose that I just wish it weren't so.  I realize how naive that must sound.

This reminds me of Gandhi's "You must become the change which you wish to see in the world."  The first time I read that quote, I too came back with a "well, duh" moment.  As for learning about people and how it is often best to turn a deaf ear, blind eye, etc, I am still trying to develop myself in that area.  I realize how naive that must sound.

  That too is fair, Guro C.  My problem is that the other rewards have not turned out like I expected them.  So, perhaps you are right.  It may be time to look elsewhere.  I never expected universal respect or gratitude, and certainly not ease or perfection, but the experience has been very different.  I realize how naive that must sound.

"Dog" Tom, thank you for the quote.

So thank you both for your wisdom and thoughts, and excuse my naivete, which is paramount.      Thank you for letting me whine and pant, and thank you both for your insight. 

This is hard to write:

Lately, I seem to see that the evil folks in the world are moving forward.  That is to say, I know a lot of people whose sole purpose at work is to keep their jobs.  They all seem to be making upwards of 100 grand a year.  I seem to keep seeing that as a whole, people evaluate success based on what kind of a car you drive and how big your house is.  I am a school teacher.  I drive a Chevy (it's dirty) and I live in a condo with a pretty view (but it's old, and not very big).  I know a lot of mean men who treated women like dirt and seemed to keep sleeping with a bevy of beautiful ladies.  I seem to keep running into the fact that EVERYONE is judging, and no one, family, friends, or coworkers really have your back.  They are too busy pointing out that they live in bigger houses and that my car is dirty.  Naturally, they do this behind your back, and life never seems to be free from judgement.  I can count quite a few folks on my fingers who turned out NOT to be authentic people.  Lost of them are people that I once shared a beer with and commented that we'd be "friends forever".

I don't mean to be negative, but in terms of character and authenticity, the last few years have not put a great amount of faith in my heart as far as the folks that have drifted in and out of my life.  I write this based on many people that have the label "friends" and "ex-friends" and not about the folks that I have met through DBMA.

I write that because I have a 14 month old son who is my whole world, and I know that someday soon, he is going to look at me and ask about the world outside the walls of the condo he lives in with my wife and I.  I am still formulating an answer.

Sorry to be a little negative.  I'm going to turn 30 in a few weeks.  If you are over 30 and shaking your head at me, please excuse me.  Hopefully, this is just my 1/3 life crisis.  Happy belated Father's Day to those out there with pups of your own.   

Today, I am grateful for a new computer, which is set up and running very well as I type this!

Today, I am grateful for some downtime with which to organize my home.  That may read as minor to some, but it mens a lot to me.

I am grateful for the weekend that I just spent with my family (wife, son, sister in law) in Las Vegas.  We stayed at Circus Circus and it was a nice, family oriented time.

I try not to live my life by planning for happiness, "I'll be happy when I ...".  You can plan your whole life away.  That being said, I have been saying for a while now, "I'll be happy when this school year ends."  Today, I am happy and grateful because the 07-08 school year (I teach 7-8th grade) has ended.

Today, I am grateful that it is the last day that my students will be on campus.  Let the summer begin!   

Today, I am grateful that my son will never have to go to the school at which I teach.  I am also grateful for the fact that academic years come to an end.

Has the R1 completely been played out, worn out it's welcome, ect?  Just as a suggestion if the HOC doesn't end up working out, or am I just typing to type?

A few weeks ago, I fractured my right foot.  I have been off of the forum for a few weeks, because I have been bummed out.  The first doctor told me that I would be on crutches for 6 - 8 weeks.  No pressure on the broken foot.  The orthopedic doctor told me that the first doctor was crazy, and that he wanted me to start weening myself off of the crutches.  So, last week I attended all 40 hours of the Legends Camp at the Inosanto Academy, just with no kicking of any kind.  This week, I need to get my training group back together and start getting back in shape.  I am grateful that a summer of training that I have not been planning has not been blown by a broken foot.  I am also grateful for this forum, and I intend to get back on and remain active.

I have a question for Guro Crafty, relevant to this thread:

Guro, in your tenure as the ringmaster (and as a fighter), have you ever seen a straight blade trainer vs. karambit trainer fight at any of the Gatherings where:

1. The karambit was used in a manner that was unique to the shape/attributes of a karambit?
or
2. The karambiteer (tell me that's not a real term in FMA, because I wrote it just to be silly) immediately dropped down to the ground and you had a bladed standing fighter vs. bladed Silat type ground fighter situation?

Guro, if you have ever seen 1 or 2 in the context of a Gathering, what was the outcome?  Thank you.  GD

Today, I am grateful to have finished a paper for grad. school that I (how lame of me) left for the last moment.  The paper actually ended up coming out quite nice, and I submitted it electronically with ten minutes to spare!  That paper will be used for a seminar later this month in which I will try to get closer to fleshing out a topic for my dissertation.  I actually am quite proud of my product, despite having left it for the end!

Also, I posted this last night on the members' board, but my sad little dying computer at home crashed before I could post this here, and it was pretty late, so I gave up.  This is a bit embarrassing but here goes:


My head and neck are a bit stiff today, but I'm okay, and still grateful.